Video and Performance
4 Hour durational performance, exhibited in “Object + Body” at Future Tenant Gallery, Pittsburgh, PA September 2018
In our society, and in my own experience, womanhood is often not without complicated self-image and a search for improvement. We feel pressure from the outside to engage in daily routines to modify, slenderize, feminize, and compromise. We internalize that pressure until explicit expectation is no longer needed to induce constant, disciplined attention to self or the feeling of never being good enough. We maintain our own sense of powerlessness and insufficiency through a habituated preoccupation with appearance—always looking, examining, and criticizing ourselves and our bodies. In this piece I establish my own disciplined routine, one where I reject and dismantle the learned routines of femininity. Facing the backside of a mirrored panel, I allow myself to exist in space without questioning my body’s place in it. I scratch away at the reflective emulsion with my fingernails and rudimentary tools to disrupt the gaze and shift the narrative.